Friday, May 30, 2008

Day 151 - Friday 30th May

"The past can hurt. You can either run from it or learn from it” – The Lion King

I am in such a different place to where I was just over 10 years ago and am a very different person. From leaving school I hung round with people whose main aim in life was to sign on the dole or to get pregnant so they could get a council house. I messed up my A levels as my first love (who was a good lad) went back to Scotland but I went onto Uni and got a degree in business and IT. I know I could have worked harder but I still succeeded.
Since the age of about 18 I went out with a string of unsuitable men. I had very low self esteem and thought it was better to be with anyone rather than no-one. I spent 18 months with a man older than me but he had no prospects and spent all his money in the pub. Then I moved on from there to spend 5 years with a man who was 13 years older than me with 2 broken marriages and 4 kids from the 2 marriages. I knew him before I got together with him and thought he was a real pillock – so god only knows why I spent such a long time of my life with him. My family must have despaired with me.
Luckily my James came along and rescued me from this and I have had the happiest 10 years of my life. I am much more belief in myself and have a good job and a lovely home and family. I consider myself blessed to be in such a happy place.
What I have learned is that I think you need to go through some hard or bad times to appreciate the good things in life and that youngsters make mistakes but it doesn’t mean that it is the end, with love and support they will see sense and come out the other end much richer for the experience. I hope I can put this into practice when Zoë is growing up.

9 comments:

Lynne said...

Claire some very honest journalling here!I
t is hard to watch your children make mistakes and sometimes have those mistakes for life! but you are quite right mistakes have to be made to learn and grow and as parents we have to be there to pick up the pieces if necessary (I know from experience)

Mary B said...

What a lovely photograph.
Claire I am sure that you are the best mum Zoe can have

Scrappy~Sarah said...

Claire some very heart felt journaling there, thankyou for feeling able to share.....I love that photo.....a definate aaahhh moment, and one that makes it all worthwhile :)

BallooBear said...

We think your a fab person AND a fab mum..Zoe is a lucky little girl x

knitkath said...

Lovely honest journalling, you certainly seem to have learnt from your experiences! Great pic!

Steph said...

lovely photo and well done on your honest journalling

willowthewysp said...

Gorgeous photo..so sweet!
Im so glad you are so happy woth a great man...its is true, you do need to make mistakes in life, to know that they are mistakes IYKWIM!
People do usually come through the other side if given the chance:)

Curly said...

That's so wonderful to read Claire. You have to be brave and remember these things when you need them most, I know it will be trying I have to face it yet too!!!!

malaryush said...

Your family look happy and perfect - you deserve every minute of your great times together